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Monkeys and Bibles


Merle D. Wright March 2nd, 2011

Since reading the Gazette’s Feb. 9 Commentaries (Jason Reese, “Legislate morality,” Kurt Hochenauer, “Separation anxiety”) about new bills introduced in the Oklahoma Legislature that would permit some religious teaching in our public schools that concern creationism verses evolution, I have been struggling with some feelings.

I suppose that these bills would make laws allowing the teaching of creationism in the science classroom along with evolution.

So what would the teachers say about creationism? Would they bring a Bible to class and contrast it with science and teach that the book of Genesis is an accurate account of the beginning of mankind? OK, let’s say that they do this the first half hour, and the next half hour they would then discuss the evolution of man.

Talk about monkeys and bibles — I think this would trigger some interesting science-class/Bible moments that might not be favorable to the right-wing extremists in Oklahoma. If I were a student, I might raise my hand and ask a few questions.

First half hour: “How old is the earth?”

Teacher’s answer: “Approximately 4.6 billion years old.”

Second half hour: “How old is the earth?” Teacher’s answer: “As old as your preacher says it is.”

Next day, first half hour: “Which species evolved first? Man and woman or monkeys?” Teacher’s answer: “Monkeys, of course.”

Second half hour: “Which did God make first, man and woman or monkeys?” Teachers answer: “Man and woman in the Garden of Eden.”

The next day, first half hour: “Is evolution of the species a theory?

Teacher’s answer: “It is a theory.” Second half hour: “Is creationism a theory?” Teacher’s answer: “Creationism is a fact, just like in the Bible.”

“Then you believe only in creationism?” Teacher’s answer: “Yes, I’m going to run on the Republican ticket for the Oklahoma House of Representatives next year.”

— Merle Wright
Oklahoma City

 
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03.03.2011 at 02:35 Reply

I think I miss understood the satire you were attempting to portray.  

 

The thing that annoyes me the most is the reference to the Bible as fact.  There isn't a single thing in the Bible that can be proven to be fact.  And if one's belief that it is fact actually makes it so, then I  who's to say Harry Potter or Twilight aren't fact?  Are we going to start teaching that too? 

 

Let's stick to verifyable provable facts.  Passing such a law only guarantees state mandated incompetance.  If the parents want their children to believe in creationism they should send them to Catholic School.  Don't expect the state to fortify your own beliefs when doing so means disrespecting the beliefs of many other faiths.  What we're talking about is one of the very oppressive agenda's that caused the first Americans to leave England.  Why are we even considering moving away from the principals that this country were founded on?

 

I could also get into the number of disgusting things that could be deemed as acceptable by impressionable children if the Bible is spoke of as fact.  But I think letting your mind run with that thought does enough justice as it is.

 

 

 

 

Oh what the heck...  Lot's Daughters got him drunk and raped him.

 

 
 
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