Sunday 20 Apr

Holy Ghost People

Holy Ghost People examines two sisters whose bond is torn — but by what? After her sibling has been missing for more than a year, Charlotte (Emma Greenwell, TV's Shameless) intends to find out.
04/15/2014 | Comments 0

No Holds Barred

RLJ Entertainment's new Blu-ray for No Holds Barred begins with what seems like dozens of trailers for movies starring pro wrestlers from the WWE talent pool. Each flick went direct to home video, but once upon a time — aka 1989 — one had to go to the multiplex to catch such a spectacle.
04/15/2014 | Comments 0

Knights of Badassdom

In 2008, the third act of the guy comedy Role Models used LARPing — live-action role-playing, that is — as a backdrop for our protagonists' lessons learned. Today, Knights of Badassdom extends that half-hour into a full feature, to the point where viewers are left not smiling, but exhausted. 
04/02/2014 | Comments 0

Switched on

Not everything on television has to appeal to mass audiences. In fact, with the further fractioning of viewership thanks to alternatives like Netflix and VOD, more series can afford to become more niche. Here are five examples of shows both past and present — and new to DVD and/or Blu-ray — that encompass some of the more outrageous ideas ever to go beyond boardroom discussion.
04/02/2014 | Comments 0

Confession of Murder

Seventeen years after slaying 10 women and getting away with it, the charismatic serial killer Du-sok (Park Si-hoo) comes clean with a Confession of Murder, in this 2012 South Korean crime thriller. He does so by publishing a book that dishes all the grisly details.
04/02/2014 | Comments 0
Home · Articles · Movies · Horror · Red Riding Hood

Red Riding Hood

The freakazoid love child of Stephen King and Stephenie Meyer

Doug Bentin March 16th, 2011

You’ll have no one to blame but yourself if you become stupid because of “Red Riding Hood.”

Your brain will function as it would if you’d been the guest of honor at the Zombie Family picnic last weekend.

In this version — make that “perversion” — of the old fairy tale, Red’s name is actually Valerie (Amanda Seyfried, “Letters to Juliet”), which I’m sure was common in medieval Germany. Her village on the edge of the Black Forest has been plagued by a werewolf for three generations, and no one has been bright enough to check on the whereabouts of the villagers on full-moon nights.

But more urgent than the fact that her sister has just become wolfie chow, Valerie has been promised in marriage to Henry (Max Irons, “Dorian Gray”) while she is really in love with Peter (Shiloh Fernandez, “Cadillac Records”), much to the annoyance of her father, Cesaire (Billy Burke, “Drive Angry”).

I’ve never seen Gary Oldman more bored.

That’s right: This is a paranormal romance, the freakazoid love child of Stephen King and Stephenie Meyer. The picture is directed by Catherine Hardwicke, she who was fired after misdirecting the first “Twilight.” The hunky leads have that Robert Pattinson thing going, while old pros Gary Oldman and Julie Christie tag along to provide the ham, sliced extra thick, especially Christie as Grandmother. I’ve never seen Oldman more bored during a movie. Hey, Gary, me, too.

Believe me: This one’s not badfunny as much as it is bad-irritating.

Or just bad.

  • Currently 3.5/5 Stars.
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