Love, Oklahoma Gazette style

The next day I placed the ad in the newspaper. I received nearly 100 responses that varied from the farmer who mailed me a sweet marriage proposal to the surgeon who bought me dinner at Junior’s restaurant. Most left a recorded message; unless they sounded psychotic on the recording, I returned their calls. If we “clicked,” that was great, but most of the time there was no “click” and we went our separate ways.

After a month I placed a second ad which invited men to contact me if they liked New York City, strolling through Central Park, and came with their own frequent-flier miles. I was loathe to share my miles (still am), as they are one of my most coveted possessions.

The ad only garnered about 30 responses. I met a couple of men, dating one of them for about six weeks before mutually deciding we were not in each other’s future. It happened after a weekend trip to Dallas. In hindsight, I realize that weekends to Dallas had played a significant role in two of my previous breakups. I decided that if I ever wanted to end a relationship, all I needed was a night in Dallas.

I decided to write one more ad. Amid so many women looking to meet men (and vice versa), I needed my ad to stand out. The BMW advertisement on the back page of the Gazette gave me what I was looking for: “Words say a lot, but the sensation of a test drive will leave you speechless.”

Using this as my title, I penned my final ad, which said that the man I was looking for would not be intimidated by an articulate woman and was willing to engage in an egalitarian relationship.

I think it was the use of the word “egalitarian” that yielded me only 10 responses. It didn’t matter. Third time was a charm.

This year Brad and I will celebrate our 16th wedding anniversary. As it turns out, he had his own frequent-flier miles, which he has generously shared with me over the years. He also came with two beautiful daughters whom I love and adore.

I am, without question, one of the luckiest women in the world. What made it work? We have persevered, in good times and in bad, for better and for worse, but mostly … we stayed away from Dallas.

—Sheila Crow
Oklahoma City

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