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Talking turkey


Gazette staff April 11th, 2012

After recounting a terrifying story of being attacked by a turkey, Sen. Ralph Shortey has offered up a new way to kill the man-eating beasts.

Brad Gregg

Senate Bill 1420, which allows physically disabled individuals to use laser sights while hunting on private property, recently passed the House.

Co-authored by Shortey and Rep. John Bennett, the measure passed the house on a 92-0 vote and heads to the Senate for final approval.

“This bill was filed to address the needs of quadriplegics, paraplegics and other citizens with significant physical challenges, including veterans,” said Bennett, R-Sallisaw. “It will give individuals with physical challenges the ability to regain a sense of normalcy by allowing them to use a laser sight to hunt.

The legislation includes sensible safeguards, while allowing these men and women the ability to enjoy hunting just like any other person.”

But could the motives be a little darker, say … actively enlisting a private army to seek revenge on the beast that wronged him?

Probably not, but there’s an interesting story here.

The Associated Press reported that in a debate over open-carry legislation, Shortey said he began carrying a gun in his vehicle after he stepped into what must have been a real-life version of Angry Birds.

He was working at an oil and gas site when a turkey attacked him.

The legislator did not have a gun, so he had to do what any manly-man without a firearm does:

“I beat it with a club,” he said.

“That’s all I could do. I wish that I had a gun with me.”

But despite successfully facing down what must have seemed like the gaping maw of Satan, it appears the Oklahoma City Republican lost something that day: his peace of mind.

“Wait until you get attacked by a turkey, you will know the fear that a turkey can evoke in a person,” Shortey said.

 
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