Sunday 20 Apr

Holy Ghost People

Holy Ghost People examines two sisters whose bond is torn — but by what? After her sibling has been missing for more than a year, Charlotte (Emma Greenwell, TV's Shameless) intends to find out.
04/15/2014 | Comments 0

No Holds Barred

RLJ Entertainment's new Blu-ray for No Holds Barred begins with what seems like dozens of trailers for movies starring pro wrestlers from the WWE talent pool. Each flick went direct to home video, but once upon a time — aka 1989 — one had to go to the multiplex to catch such a spectacle.
04/15/2014 | Comments 0

Knights of Badassdom

In 2008, the third act of the guy comedy Role Models used LARPing — live-action role-playing, that is — as a backdrop for our protagonists' lessons learned. Today, Knights of Badassdom extends that half-hour into a full feature, to the point where viewers are left not smiling, but exhausted. 
04/02/2014 | Comments 0

Switched on

Not everything on television has to appeal to mass audiences. In fact, with the further fractioning of viewership thanks to alternatives like Netflix and VOD, more series can afford to become more niche. Here are five examples of shows both past and present — and new to DVD and/or Blu-ray — that encompass some of the more outrageous ideas ever to go beyond boardroom discussion.
04/02/2014 | Comments 0

Confession of Murder

Seventeen years after slaying 10 women and getting away with it, the charismatic serial killer Du-sok (Park Si-hoo) comes clean with a Confession of Murder, in this 2012 South Korean crime thriller. He does so by publishing a book that dishes all the grisly details.
04/02/2014 | Comments 0
Home · Articles · Movies · Comedy · Ted


A cuddly teddy bear is at the center of 'Ted,' but its raunchy comedy isn't for kids.

Phil Bacharach June 29th, 2012

Ted is a foul-mouthed, hooker-loving pothead prone to comments of racism, homophobia and misogyny. Ted is also a stuffed teddy bear.


That's the premise, plot and central joke of Ted, the movie-directorial debut of Seth MacFarlane, creator of TV’s animated series Family Guy. It's a funny enough idea, but stretched mighty thin for feature-film length.

MacFarlane supplies the voice of the titular character, as he does for Family Guy's Peter Griffin, but the similarities don't end there. Written by MacFarlane and two of his TV collaborators, Ted is chock full of non sequiturs, politically incorrect humor and the conviction that pop-culture references are funny in and of themselves. Sometimes it works, and Ted, to its credit, boasts a handful of outrageously funny bits. But it’s also slack-paced and uneven enough to screw up your equilibrium.

Mark Wahlberg (Contraband) plays John Bennett, a 35-year-old Boston guy with a curious backstory. As a smarmy voiceover narrator explains, John was a lonely kid in the '80s when he made a fateful Christmas wish that his beloved teddy be able to talk and befriend him. That wish came true.

Decades later, John is in a dead-end job and spends most of his time doing bong hits with Ted. Adding to his dilemma, John's gorgeous girlfriend, Lori (Mila Kunis, Friends with Benefits), thinks it's time for him to grow up.

MacFarlane draws things out with farts, shoehorned cameos and sitcom fodder, like Joel McHale (TV's Community) as an oily boss with designs on Lori, and Giovanni Ribisi (Avatar) doing his creepy shtick. For every laugh, expect four tortured references to Flash Gordon, Tom Skerritt and the like.

If you're OK with that ratio, and yearn to see a teddy bear smack Wahlberg's bare ass with an antenna, get to the theater now.

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