According to Les and Leslie Parrott " the wedded directors of Seattle Pacific University's Center for Relationship Development " today's couples automatically argue over the silliest, most minute things, without taking time to understand our significant others' position. This results in fights that shouldn't happen in the first place, which lead to bitter resentment.
This how-to title offers common-sense solutions, such as to love with your head as well as your heart, and to hone your empathic abilities so you're truly listening to what your partner has to say. Notice what they're feeling, try to put yourself in that perspective, and act to help.
The whole idea is to stop criticizing and nagging your spouse and instead offer constructive, helpful comments; otherwise, you only set them off and make them angrier. Avoiding conflict strengthens your bond, and " hey, here's an added benefit " improves things in the bedroom, not to mention the rest of your life in general. In short, positive care equals a happy union.
With brief, breezy chapters and several checklists, this book would be smooth sailing for any couple marooned in choppy waters, although it's not a cure-all for every marital woe.
The Parrotts also are co-creators of the online eHarmony Marriage program, which they shamelessly plug in the whole of one chapter. Regardless of how well that program does or does not work, spending several pages recommending it is an advertisement, and no one wants to pay $20 for an advertisement. That quibble aside, "Trading Places" is something troubled couples would be wise to seek out.