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None December 22nd, 2007



Sadly, this horror spoof is the kind of horror spoof where the title says it all. Writer/director Matt Flynn reaches for that "Scream"-style postmodern irony in "Hack!," but for whatever reason "” low budget, amateurish acting "” can't quite bring the film up to the level of his ambition.

The potential certainly is there, as a group of college kids "” led by former "Wonder Years" star Danica McKellar as an eggheaded nerd girl with a crush on the cute boy "” travels by boat to an island for a wildlife trip. The deserted locale serves as the home for creepy couple Juliet Landau ("Ed Wood") and Sean Kanan (TV's "The Bold and the Beautiful"), hopeful filmmakers working on their latest opus: a splatter film in which these youths "” the black guy, the gay guy, the slut girl, etc. "” unknowingly will star.

Landau and Kanan sport various get-ups "” from clowns to kabuki "” to take out these would-be movie stars one by one. Trouble is, what should be scary comes off as silly and unintentionally funny. For example, a wanton round of sex becomes coitus interruptus as a chainsaw-wielding guy moves in for a massacre, and the actors' reactions are comical rather than realistic.

Only McKellar emerges unscathed "¦ until a self-congratulatory bit before the end credits when she, Landau, Kanan and Flynn take a bow toward the audience, as if anyone will be applauding. Nice try, but no luck.

"”Rod Lott

  • Currently 3.5/5 Stars.
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