Saturday 18 May
 
 

The Last Stand

Early in The Last Stand, the small-town sheriff played by Arnold Schwarzenegger says, "It's my day off. Should be a quiet weekend." That's the new way of saying, "I've got one week to retirement," because it signals — with flashing neon and everything — that life is going to royally upend those plans.
05/17/2013 | Comments 0

Texas Chainsaw

One of the most inconsistent franchises in movie history is the one beget by Tobe Hooper's 1974 classic, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. How does one follow all those less-than-beloved sequels? Lionsgate's latest in the series — the seventh — has a solution: Ignore 'em.
05/17/2013 | Comments 0

Captain America: Collector’s Edition

Not long after Batman changed Hollywood in the summer of 1989, every studio wanted to have the next comics-based blockbuster. I remember visiting Penn Square Mall’s multiplex (as I did often back then) and seeing a poster for Captain America. The one-sheet was comprised of little more than a close-up of Cap’s iconic shield and a promise to arrive next summer.
05/16/2013 | Comments 0

Dark Circles

With the Broken Lizard comedy troupe becoming increasingly broken, member Paul Soter has branched off to write and direct something about as far away as one can get from the likes of Super Troopers and Beerfest: a horror film. Now that I've seen it, I'm thinking maybe he should stay on his own.
05/16/2013 | Comments 0

Die! Die! My Darling!

File 1965's Die! Die! My Darling! under that now-dead subgenre dubbed "Grande Dame Guignol." The Hammer Films production may lack the dueling duo of two twilight-era titans of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? and the others, but truth be told, Tallulah Bankhead is fierce enough to provide all the fire it needs.
05/14/2013 | Comments 0
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Action

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor


None August 7th, 2008

mummy

Reviewer's Grade: C+

Brendan Fraser ("Journey to the Center of the Earth") returns as Rick O'Connell, the dig-'em-up adventurer who once tangled with Imhotep and The Rock in The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor. This time he's accompanied by a new wife (Maria Bello,  "The Jane Austen Book Club," taking over the part for Rachel Weisz) and his newly grown-up son Alex (Luke Ford, " McLeod's Daughters").  Alex, aspiring to the family biz, digs up the mummy of Emperor Han (Jet Li), who was an evil, world-dominating type back before sliced bread. In a totally shocking and unforeseen plot development, Emperor Han is revived and heads out to reclaim the world as his army's personal marching grounds.

While fast-paced and not un-watchable, "Dragon Emperor" lacks the charm of its closest genetic relative, the "Indiana Jones" series. The characters are flat, predictable, and often boring during the moments they aren't escaping death. Luke Ford's performance is about as compelling as watching a third-grader in a school play, and Maria Bello's English accent is borderline.

The movie's only saving grace is Li and Michelle Yeoh ("Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon"), but unfortunately they're criminally underused so the principles can exchange limp repartee. PG-13

"”Mike Robertson

 
  • Currently 3.5/5 Stars.
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