Caesar (Dave Campfield, also the writer/director/producer/editor) is an anal-retentive wannabe actor who lives with his slob of a half-brother, Otto (Paul Chomicki), a guy still bearing a torch for a girl from school. She sells used shaving cream — a line that sums up everything that is wrong about this movie. 

In order to impress her and her kids, Otto becomes a seasonal Santa, with Caesar as his reluctant elf. The two acquire the wrath of another costumed Santa, Demian (Deron Miller, Dahmer vs. Gacy), who exercises his ire by murdering all the siblings' friends, using their Thanksgiving-dinner invite list. This gives way to an obvious (but wholly uninspired) parody of 1984's infamous Silent Night, Deadly Night, including a re-mounting of aging scream queen Linnea Quigley on antlers.

Inexplicably borrowing the ticking-clock and split-screen gimmicks from TV's 24 — sooo 2001 for a 2012 movie, don't you think? —  Deadly Xmas is like a Troma project in need of Ritalin: severely unfocused, painfully unfunny, frustrating amateurish and a total waste of time. Grown men should know better, myself included.  —Rod Lott

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