Chicken-Fried News: Bat, man 


It turns out some of the zoo’s most dangerous animals aren’t always found in a cage or behind glass.

City health officials are concerned some recent visitors to the Oklahoma City Zoological Park and Botanical Garden might have come into contact with a rabid bat discovered earlier this month on the ground between the Great EscApe habitat and Big Rivers Cafe, according to a report by KFOR. The bat in question was not part of the zoo’s animal collection.

Silly rabid, the zoo is for kids!

Now, hypothetically speaking, if one were a wild, rabies-carrying flittermouse in need of help, where else would one have to go but the zoo? Unfortunately, the health care system in this country is not yet to a point where an honest-to-goodness night mammal can just simply check itself into a veterinary clinic (Sen. James Lankford, please consider this when crafting the next Republican health care bill).

Only a few zoo visitors are believed to have encountered the bat, which was discovered around 1:45 p.m. on a Sunday. Anyone who thinks they might have actually touched the animal should get checked out by a doctor, but health officials told KFOR that one does not contract the often fatal disease simply by being in the vicinity of the carrier. Usually rabies is transmitted to humans from animals through a bite.

Maybe this is exactly what the zoo has been missing — close brushes with real danger. Here is an idea: Put those alligators on a leash tied around a lamppost near the walking path. People love the adrenaline rush of facing possible death while knowing their own safety is firmly within their control — in this case, as long as they stay out of the ’gators leashed radius. And anyone dumb enough to get too close, well, they’re batty.

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