Chicken-Fried News: Monster’s ball

Pokémon GO has truly captured a generation, and it’s no doubt giving neighborhood watches across the metro a headache.

Have you seen a pack of kids roaming around near your flowerbeds? Is there a car that’s pulled over for a few minutes by your curb with no explanation at all? They could be dastardly thieves scoping out their next target. Or they could merely be hunting down a virtual Pikachu.

“Gotta catch ’em all” is the well-known Pokémon tagline but probably also an unofficial mission statement for developers of the GPS-based augmented reality game app that has nearly as many active daily mobile users as Twitter. Even if you’re not a fan, the game concept of hunting down digital cartoon monsters while traveling around in the real world has likely been at least vaguely explained to you.

The increased foot traffic is a boost for local businesses. Oklahoma Shirt Company offered to print shirts with the logos of the three in-game teams — Mystic, Valor and Instinct — for free. Around 3,000 people participated, according to KFOR.com.

To the great fortune of Chicken-Fried News and Oklahoma Gazette staffers who enjoy the thrills of Pokémon GO but not the hassle of venturing into the real world, our fiercely independent alt-weekly is lucky enough to host its own Pokémon Gym, a place where locals battle to prove their superiority.

On a clear day, rough-and-tumble Chicken-Fried News field correspondent Ben Luschen and his Scyther, “R. Westbrook,” can challenge the owner of the White Buffalo gym without leaving his desk, though Luschen utilizes great restraint in limiting all attempts to his lunch hour only.

At the time of this writing, our gym is claimed by MilesTheGreek, a Level 17 Team Instinct player, and his hulking Venusaur who we can only hope is nicknamed “GyroMazing.”

Congratulations, Miles. You are indeed a worthy overlord, but know this: We’re coming for you. Don’t be surprised on your return visit when you see your former spot claimed by ElwellEats and his impressively taut Raticate, “BeefCheeks.”

Print headline: Monster’s ball

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