Mickey Avalon-Self Titled 

MySpace Records

Nothing good can come of this MySpace Records, I'm convinced. Although the social Web site has been a boon to several indie bands, the idea of pulling unsigned talent from its cesspool and giving them a major-record deal is a dangerous one, judging solely from the no-talent behind its first single-artist release: Mickey Avalon.
 
Yet another white guy attempting hip-hop, the alleged former male prostitute Avalon dares you to like him: Often performing shirtless and in lipstick, he seems to be more about an image than an artist.
 
This is confirmed by his press kit' which states, "No street kid glam rap whore ever sang about his dick with such panache"' and cemented when you actually hear the 11-song, K-Fed-esque tripe comprising his debut (and, with any luck, swan song). And yes, he does sing about his penis on the appropriately named "My Dick," which clocks in as the disc's 69th track. Haw-haw! Ain't that clever?
 
You know the answer.
 
- Rod Lott

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