Newly elected Tulsa council member loses wallet to thief 

Well, here's something you don't read every day. Christ was arrested on complaints of public intoxication and petty larceny.

Here's the parable, lambs: A newly elected Tulsa City Council member was celebrating her win in downtown Tulsa last week when she noticed Jordan Lee Christ, 26, making off with her wallet, according to the Tulsa Word.

"I looked over and saw that kid doing something, and I thought, 'That didn't look right,'" Maria Barnes told The World. "I laugh at it when you look at it now, but, boy, it was not funny."

Barnes said she knew something was up when she noticed the hot pink strap of her wallet peeking out of Christ's clothing. She yelled, sending a mob of Barnes' followers into the streets to chase an allegedly inebriated Christ down.

But God wasn't on his side this night. Steve Gallo, an Oklahoma House of Representatives candidate, wrestled Christ to the ground, according to the World. Barnes horrifically broke a fingernail in the tussle (it was her sacrificial lamb), but she got her wallet back.

The World reported that Christ was booked into the Tulsa Jail. Christ has been convicted in the past for assault and battery, larceny, outraging public decency (our personal favorite) and Peeping Tom (but not doubting Thomas).

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