You know, do it.
That’s according to a study conducted by the surprisingly statistics-friendly dating site SeekingArrangement.com. The pole found — oh, excuse us, that’s “poll” — that Oklahoma City is the fourth most promiscuous city in the country. We hit this proud spot because 64 percent of wealthy men in town have seven or more sexual partners anally — oops, make that “annually.”
These
stunning findings are right in line with Chicken-Fried News’ long-held
theory that the thicker the wallet, the easier the spread. We think
we’re onto something here.
Keep
on frackin’, OKC, and perhaps we can screw ourselves to the top of next
year’s list. We have only Chicago (72 percent); Birmingham, Ala. (70
percent); and Las Vegas (68 percent) to mount.
True,
we may pick up a dose of something on our way up, but hey, if our
sports teams fail us, we’ve gotta be No. 1 in something! (Or should that
be “in somebodies”? High-five, bro!)
