Recurring Themes
Awesome Capacities: Jason Panchalk, 36, was admitted to the Pima County (Arizona) jail in December, facing a charge of trafficking in stolen property, but he arrived prepared. According to a jailer, Panchalk was carrying “some syringes, matches, lighter, heroin, marijuana, and an assortment of pills,” all inside his rectum. And in October, court officials in…
Least Justifiable Homicides
David Thomson, 49, was convicted in Edinburgh, Scotland, of smothering his mom to death after she had taunted him for his inept suicide attempt several weeks before (October). In Sydney, Australia, a man was charged with beating a neighbor to death because the neighbor was watering his lawn in violation of the city’s water restrictions…
The Weirdo-American Community
In December, street performer John Domingue said the Huntington Beach, Calif., police have finally stopped hassling him for soliciting tips at the city’s famous Pier Plaza when he demonstrates his skill at hammering nails into his nose without serious injury. (Some bleeding results, which is why police said they stopped him in the first place.)…
Semi-Pro
Reviewer’s grade: B As the latest sports comedy to star the great Will Ferrell, “Semi-Pro” is more than semi-funny, although not one that goes the distance. It’s just like his other ball-oriented (in both senses of the phrase) laughers in that a hopelessly inept underdog rises to the top, but here’s something completing different:…
Least Competent Criminals
More Questionable Judgments: David Holland, 46, gave a DNA sample last year to police in San Jose, Calif., to help resolve murder charges against his brother, but was then arrested for an until-then-unsolved 2001 rape when his DNA sample matched that left behind by the rapist. Edward Debrow of San Antonio, Texas, who was sentenced…
Family Values
Geraldine Magda, 44, was arrested in Austin, Minn., in January, following a nursing-home visit to hold the hand of her dying sister in her final hours. Magda was charged with stealing the wedding ring from her sister’s finger during the hand-holding. A Chicago man traveled to Sheboygan, Wis., in December to finally meet the 18-year-old…
The Unknown Trilogy
2008 Three times is no charm in “The Unknown Trilogy,” an independently made anthology film in the same vein as “The Twilight Zone,” only minus the suspense. In a framing device that borders on parody, Dr. Sol Rubin (Robert Costanzo from “The Sopranos” “¦ the video game, that is) introduces three cases of bizarre human…
Sports consultant urges city to approve tax for NBA
One of the architects of the first MAPS project has a simple message for Oklahoma City on the upcoming sales-tax extension vote: Seize the moment. Rick Horrow, chief executive officer of Horrow Sports Ventures, a sports business consulting company in Miami, Fla., spoke before a luncheon crowd hosted by the Greater Oklahoma City Chamber…
Lake Placid 2
2008 Written by TV wunderkind David E. Kelley, 1999’s “Lake Placid” was an crocodile movie with little bite —? a harmless, mildly engaging, summer-season concoction of horror and comedy. By contrast, the only laughs to be had in “Lake Placid 2” are the ones you’ll emit at it, rather than with it. Released straight to…
Mailed masterpieces get stamp of approval from Underground
Sarah Hearn is a studious participant and collector of mail art, which is simply slapping a stamp on a work of art and sending it through the mail. Hearn started taking part in mail art after college as a way to keep in touch with friends, and has assembled the “Four Letter Word L*O*V*E” exhibit…
The Republic Tigers – The Republic Tigers
Chop Shop/Atlantic Kansas City, Mo.’s The Republic Tigers have released a four-song EP that is interestingly ambient, yet catchy enough not to fade into background noise. “Sinkin’ Annie, Down, Down, Down, Down” sounds sweet, with pursed vocal melodies on top of slow keyboard-backdrop bleeps. Secondary vocals ride just behind the lead voice, layering harmonies…
Be Kind Rewind
Reviewer’s grade: D+ I once saw a certain type of whimsy lover denigrated by the term “Alice quoter,” as in someone who quotes from “Alice in Wonderland” so often, they make you want to brain them with the Caterpiller’s hookah. Movie watchers of the same type might well be called “Rewinders” in future, because this…
Built to Spill grows up without sacrificing music
Built to Spill has long been considered a member of the independent music scene, despite having a home at the major label Warner Bros. for more than a decade. However, Built to Spill guitarist and vocalist Doug Martsch does resist playing the part of the hip, aging musician and, at times, sounds like the indifferent…
Oklahoma woman holds falling space debris distinction
Here you have it ” another reason not to leave your house in the morning: injury by “falling space debris.” A Tulsa woman holds the dubious record of being the only person ever to have been hit by CFN-coined “FSD,” according to a recent report in The Oklahoman, coinciding with the United States’ shooting…
Eyes wide open
I’m proud of us Oklahomans. Like much of the country, we, too, showed up to vote on Feb. 5. Democrats and Republicans alike not only exercised a basic civic responsibility, but also clearly made many comments through our votes about our feelings toward the recent past, our hopes for the future, and what truly is…
This just in
In case you’re worried about getting hit by FSD from the nonfunctional National Reconnaissance Office ” or NRO ” satellite shot down last week, Sen. James Inhofe issued the following statement to the CFN World Headquarters: “I commend the men and women of the United States military, especially the sailors aboard the U.S.S. Lake…
Cultural Diversity
Brand-new Japanese parents receiving a gift are then customarily obligated to give a lesser one in return, and the Yoshimiya rice shop in Fukuoka recently created the ideal such return: small bags of rice of the exact weight of the newborn, printed with its face and name, so that original gift-givers (relatives, friends) can experience…
Sex Workers Art Show
Several Duke University campus organizations, including the Women’s Center, the Student Health Center and the Women’s Studies Department, sponsored a “Sex Workers Art Show” on Feb. 3, at which nearly nude “artists” danced for students and others while vulgarly criticizing America via acts such as a woman’s pretending to eat excreted dollar bills and a…
Late artist’s collage work celebrated at Capitol
Beloved Oklahoma artist Brunel DeBost Faris left behind a wealth of creative talent and inventiveness. The popular collage and drawing mastermind is remembered for his teaching career at Oklahoma City University and contribution to art. His exhibit, “Selected Works,” is on display in the Governor’s Gallery, located on the second floor of the state Capitol,…
Plan B-ball
Plan A for the proposed Ford Center upgrade is a Tuesday vote to extend Oklahoma City’s 1-cent MAPS for Kids sales tax for a year to fund major improvements and another three months to build a practice facility for a professional basketball team, raising about $120 million. If the Big League City sales tax…
South Park: Imaginationland
2007 Although no longer a cultural phenomenon, Comedy Central’s long-running “South Park” is still rude, still crude “¦ and still pretty damned funny. Somehow, co-creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone have managed to maintain its cutting edge for more than a full decade now, and this “movie” “? really just three episodes from the 10th…
City votes on big-league chances on Tuesday
Oklahoma City voters will go to the polls Tuesday to decide on a proposition that would extend the MAPS for Kids sales tax for an additional 15 months. The penny tax, which is set to expire at the end of the year, was originally part of a plan to generate more than $500 million for…
Homeless rely on shelters when struck with the flu
The coughs can be heard across the metro, as many Oklahomans battle complications from influenza or related illnesses. But in Oklahoma City homeless shelters, a flu epidemic can have dire consequences for both members of the high-risk population they serve and the service providers who work within them. Antoinette Sanders, executive director of social services…
Oklahoma’s veteran senator discusses disagreements with Bush
In case you’re keeping track (and CFN is), you can add President George W. Bush to the list of politicians with whom Sen. James Inhofe disagrees. According to an interview with The Norman Transcript, the Tulsa Republican hasn’t agreed with the commander in chief several times recently. And we’re not talking about arguing with Bush…
Questionable Judgments
In December, even after the widely reported tiger attack on a visitor at the San Francisco Zoo, the Houston Zoo was still allowing its visitors to play “tug of war” with its own lions and tigers. A 20-pound slab of meat, attached to a long rope, is tossed into the enclosure, and visitors are encouraged…
Will Rogers Says
University of Oklahoma Press/Quaid Publishing We all know that Will Rogers never met a man he didn’t like, but what was his stance on chitlins and turnip greens? The answer can be found in “Will Rogers Says “¦ ,” a new edition of a gift book edited by Reba Collins, director emeritus of the Will…
City leaders say NBA vote is best hope to secure team
Oklahoma City businessman and Seattle SuperSonics ownership group leader Clay Bennett wants to bring the NBA team to Oklahoma City. But is it a lock that if Tuesday’s sales-tax extension passes, Oklahoma City gets a team? “We have applied to relocate to Oklahoma City. That is specific in our application,” Bennett told Oklahoma Gazette. “You…
Elizabeth: The Golden Age
2007 All the white-faced glory and implausible love story of “Elizabeth: The Golden Age” gets repackaged as DVD here. The small-screen version does little to make the budding romantic relationship between the queen (Academy Award winner Cate Blanchett) and Sir Walter Raleigh (Clive Owen) any more believable, or his saving at sea of jolly…
Boren outlines remedies for broken political system in new book
University of Oklahoma President David Boren thinks the political system is still the country’s best source of hope. But he also says it’s long overdue for a makeover. In his new book, “A Letter to America,” Boren expresses concern about a polarized U.S. political system that has locked up significant legislation for years. He sees…
Medieval life focus on pre-fair lecture series
With the annual Medieval Fair of Norman about a month away, the University of Oklahoma Outreach’s Osher Lifelong Learning Institute will help lead up to it by presenting “A Medieval Experience,” a series of free educational seminars exploring the Middle Ages, guided by experts on:” art, ” religion, ” music and ” architecture. Chris Elliott,…
MGMT – Oracular Spectacular
ces of What” isn’t particularly inspiring, and neither is “The Handshake,” but the album’s closer, “Future Reflections,” is digitally upbeat with successful studio effects on the vocals, a high-pitched organ warble and a Sixties pop-rock bass line. MGMT has managed a clever mix of pop eccentricity on “Oracular Spectacular,” which proves more fun on…
OKC rock quartet Anchors for Arsenal sets sail with new album
Undocked from the local music scene for nearly a year, Oklahoma City rock band Anchors for Arsenal has returned to port with its best album yet. The metro four-piece has been together since early 2002, said singer Jonathan Knight, but dropped out of sight in May 2007 to hole up in writing sessions and rehearsals…
Ultimate: The Greatest Sport Ever Invented by Man – Pasquale Anthony Leonardo
Breakaway Books Unless you play Ultimate, you probably don’t even know what it is. Essentially, it’s Ultimate Frisbee, and although it takes less than a page to explain the rules “? two seven-player teams pass the disc across the field until one catches it in the end zone “? but as befitting only the best…
Library to celebrate Dr. Seuss’ birthday
One of America’s most beloved children’s authors and illustrators, Dr. Seuss, is having a birthday extravaganza thrown in his honor. “Seussical Saturday” will be held 2-3:30 p.m. Saturday at Southern Oaks Library, 6900 S. Walker, to pay tribute to the man behind such timeless staples in kid-lit as:” “The Cat in the Hat,” ” “Green…
Charlie Bartlett
de: D+ This high school dramedy made by a middle-aged man whose father is a movie producer is a first feature for its director, and its grasp on reality couldn’t be any less firm if its hands were made of Crisco. Charlie Bartlett (Anton Yelchin, “Alpha Dog”) is a rich kid attending a public high…
Witless Protection
Reviewer’s grade: F Comedian Larry the Cable Guy once again dons an array of sleeveless shirts and assembles the A-material that pays his bills. Unfortunately, his A-material usually has something to do with poop, stinky feet, processed food or spandex on a fat guy. Larry plays Larry, a sheriff’s deputy with ambition to further…
King Corn
n 0pt”> Through the use of a scientist and some high-tech lab equipment, Ian Cheney and Curtis Ellis realize they are basically made of corn. The two friends descend on an Iowa farm town to grow an acre of America’s most abundant crop and to create a documentary film about farm life, agribusiness and the…
Xiu Xiu – Women as Lovers
Kill Rockstars Nestled somewhere between atmospheric noise and indie pop is the San Francisco band Xiu Xiu, which has released an album that is purposely weird and catchy. The group’s latest, “Women as Lovers,” has some of the same droning and experimental songs Xiu Xiu is known for, like “In Lust You Can Hear…
Encyclopedia Brown Solves Them All – Donald J. Sobol
Puffin Books Need a mystery solved? Live in Idaville? Got a quarter to spare? Then look no further than Encyclopedia Brown, boy detective. Puffin Books continues to reissue the original collections of Donald J. Sobol’s grade-school Sherlock, including 1968’s “Encyclopedia Brown Solves Them All,” the fifth in the series. They’re just as I remembered them…
Vantage Point
Reviewer’s grade: D Eight different character points of view of a presidential assassination are supposed to reveal the “truth” in “Vantage Point,” an amateurish, bumbling film with too-crazy plot elements and uninspiring action sequences. President Ashton (William Hurt) is headed back to Spain for a round of terrorism talks. Last time he was there,…
Oklahoma senator flip flops position on war
First, he was for the war. Now, he says it was a mistake. This would normally sound like an attack from a Republican against one of those namby-pamby Democrats who has changed his or her mind about the war in Iraq. But, hold on. It turns out this is not a case of a…
Latest Religious Messages
Lord Balaji was a locally popular Hindu god in Hyderabad, India, until a few years ago when a priest noticed that more of his worshippers were complaining that valuable U.S. professional “H-1B” visas were harder to get. Overnight, Balaji was transformed from a purveyor of general prosperity to the “visa god,” specializing in lucky H-1Bs,…
House passes bill on sex offenders in long-term care facilities
Two years ago, the state Legislature punted the issue. Today, they fully embraced the idea. Nursing home advocates like Wes Bledsoe wanted lawmakers to address the problem of registered sex offenders residing in long-term care facilities. The House Health and Human Services Committee held a hearing in 2005 where Bledsoe asked for the creation…
Government-issued badges like status symbol in Baghdad
BAGHDAD ” Badges ” multicolored, coded and biologically linked to the person to whom they are issued ” are carried by virtually everyone in Baghdad’s International Zone, or “Green Zone.” The badges mark the bearer’s status, privilege and restrictions. The bearers of these badges are almost the only ones allowed to navigate the concrete-barrier maze…
Greater Tuna’ swims with laughs at Lyric at the Plaza
When Jaston Williams and Joe Sears first started doing Texas sketches for political soirees, they couldn’t have guessed that their satirical swipes would grow into the phenomenon “Greater Tuna.” Set in little Tuna, Texas, during the course of one long hot day, the play introduces big talkers, small thinkers and assorted movers and shakers to…
The Game Plan
2007 As far as family entertainment goes, you could do worse than “The Game Plan.” This comedy “? at least for those 10 and under “? has Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson taking a break from action-adventure vehicles and treading into far lighter waters. He’s arrogant NFL quarterback superstar Joe Kingman, who’s living the dream…
Jeopardy!’ hits Oklahoma classrooms with donated games
The syndicated television game show “Jeopardy!” has teamed up with Devon Energy and KFOR-TV Channel 4 to donate 15 “Jeopardy!”-inspired educational computer programs per month to classrooms around the state. Kelly Miyahara, a “‘Jeopardy!’ Clue Crew” correspondent, visited Mark Twain Elementary School on Tuesday, demonstrating the “Classroom Jeopardy!,” an electronic, educational version of the…
