Archives – Real Astrology

If you live on the Danish island of Mando, your only hope for driving your vehicle to the mainland and back is when the tide is low. During those periods, the water often recedes far enough to expose a rough gravel road that’s laid down over a vast mudflat. Winter storms sometimes make even low-tide […]

If you have long conversations with the image in the mirror this week, I won’t call you a megalomaniacal narcissist. Nor will I make fun of you if you paint 15 self-portraits, or google yourself obsessively, or fill an entire notebook with answers to the question “Who am I, anyway?” In my astrological opinion, this […]

Here’s how author Leo Buscaglia described the rigorous requirements for being a great lover. You must “continually have the subtlety of the very wise, the flexibility of the child, the sensitivity of the artist, the understanding of the philosopher, the acceptance of the saint, the tolerance of the scholar, and the fortitude of the certain.” […]

In her essay “Write Till You Drop,” author Annie Dillard offers advice to aspiring writers. I’m going to quote a certain passage that happens to be apropos for you Libras right now. “Spend it all, shoot it, play it, lose it, all, right away, every time. Do not hoard what seems good for later . […]

As they orbit the planet, astronauts witness as many as 15 sunrises and sunsets each day. Time isn’t really sped up for them, but it seems like it. I expect you to experience a similar feeling in the coming weeks, Gemini. You may have the fantasy that you’re living the equivalent of four days every […]

If you’d like to be in supreme alignment with cosmic rhythms this week, I suggest that you completely avoid using the f-word. Likewise, you’ll maximize your chances for taking advantage of fate’s currents if you refrain from ever using the s-word, the c-word, the m-word, and the b-word. As a general rule, the more precise […]

There are very few people who can lick their own elbows, and up until now you have probably not been one of them. Judging from the current astrological configurations, however, I’m guessing that a lot of you Sagittarians are about to be more flexible, limber, and acrobatic than usual ” not just in your mental […]

The TV comedy series “Community” takes place on the sleepy campus of a community college. It features the hijinks of seven misfits who are older and weirder than their fellow students. In one episode, an inept female security guard chases the lead character, Jeff, hoping to catch and cite him for a farcical misdemeanor. As […]

In a Rolling Stone interview, musician John Mayer suggested that Tiger Woods could have avoided his terrible troubles if he had just chosen to masturbate more. Rather than literally acting out his obsessive sexual urges with a jillion women who weren’t his wife, why not contain them in the fantasy realm? I suggest you consider […]

Recently I was remembering the names of streets near the house where I grew up in Allen Park, Michigan. Although I didn’t register it at the time, they were lyrical, euphonious, and evocative: Philomene, Shenandoah, Osage, Luana, Cleophus, Gahona. As I walked and played on them day after day for years, my imagination breathed in […]