Please do not snort meth in a hot-air balloon with fake Peruvian shamans as you fly to a secret CIA fortress where you put on a mask and play strip poker with high-ranking members of the conspiracy to create one world government.
APRIL FOOL! There’s no way you’ll be invited to a whacked-out spectacle like that. Your wildness does in fact need expression, but it will be perfectly satisfied with less whacked-out adventures that are healthy for you and leave no messes in their wake. Monitor yourself for any urges you may feel to seek out over-the-top melodramas.
This article appears in Mar 25-31, 2009.