—“Sarah Palin Wants to See You!” —“Creator of Italian Volcano(R) Juices Witnesses Multiple Eruptions from Mount Etna!” —“Family Tree DNA Confirms Two NFL Players are Half-Siblings” —“Press Release – Insane Clown Posse’s ‘American Psycho Tour’“ —“Secure oklahomacaskets.com” —“URGENT: We Can Take Weiner’s Seat!” —“FabricLink.com Launches the Fairy Realm and Unveils Velcro USA’s New Children’s Costume […]
Chicken Fried News
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‘Dr. no’ strikes again
Nothing. Absolutely nothing at all … unless you’re the U.S. Congress. Oklahoma U.S. Senator Tom Coburn recently got into a kerfuffle with Senate leadership when he blocked a bill that temporarily extended funding for the FAA and highway construction, according to a story from NPR. Coburn’s problem with the bill was that part of it […]
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Munn ho!: Eighth in a series
Like news of her next movie to shoot, Steven Soderbergh’s male stripper flick, “Magic Mike.” Munn’s been cast as the girlfriend of lead Channing Tatum, who was a stripper before hitting it big in Hollywood. At Shape magazine, she’s even on the October issue’s cover, where she’s sure to attract legions of female haters by […]
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Grab ‘n’ go
Wait. Yes, we can. A couple of weeks ago, two lovely ladies (and we’re using that term loosely) pulled a pickup truck outside a Del City plumbing business, according to a report from KFOR-TV. One of the lasses pulled down her sizable drawers, plopped onto the curb and let it flow. No. 1, that is. […]
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PR BS
—“Byline for your use: Gum Disease, The Silent Killer” —“JOJO JOINS JOE JONAS AND JAY SEAN ON NORTH AMERICAN TOUR” —“Big Hooters Auction September 7th” —“FLO RIDA HAS A ‘GOOD FEELING’” —“Yoko Ono Heats Up Dancefloors Once Again With Her Latest Summer Smash ‘Talking to the Universe’” —“How Do You ’Getti Your Spaghetti?” —“DENNY’S TELL’S […]
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CFN Headline of the Week
“Olivia Munn’s Bikini Will Heal The Children” —from TheSuperficial.com, Sept. 6
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Power of the purse
The descendants of freedmen of the Cherokee Nation, who are mostly black, recently were declared to be ineligible for tribal membership following a years-long court fight. A separate case is currently going on in federal court and has yet to be decided. These freedmen are the descendants of former slaves owned by the tribes, and […]
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Marathon for the prize
Last week, those nearly 70,000 strong who follow Coyne became privy to the Lips’ latest work, which may prove even more difficult to engage than their infamous 1997 album “Zaireeka,” which requires four separate sets of speakers and a carefully synchronized pressing of as many “play” buttons to experience properly. “Takes a long time to […]
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PR BS
—“UCO Attempts To Break World Record For Largest Game of ‘Duck, Duck, Goose’” —“CarLahLah adds a little Ooh Lah Lah so you can accessorize your car as well as you accessorize yourself” —“ABC STUDIOS AND CHOP SHOP/ATLANTIC RECORDS ANNOUNCE NEW ‘GREY’S ANATOMY’ SOUNDTRACK” —“iuy ‘ @ ‘ , ‘ ank” —“New gourmet pesto brimming with […]
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CFN Quote of the Week
“Shut your mouth! Learn how to play f**king football, period! Everybody understand that? That’s everybody in this f**king group! Take care of the f**king ball!” —Josh Heupel, co-offensive coordinator at the University of Oklahoma, quoted on “Training Days with the Oklahoma Sooners” on ESPN.