Let’s just call it now: Oklahomans heretofore will think of 2018 as The Year of “Bull-Stitt.” In last month’s runoff, Oklahoma Republicans went beyond mudslinging and began launching pork production-grade super-feces against one another like trebuchet-wielding maniacs. But beyond Mick Cornett’s “Bull-Stitt” epithet, which was a little clunky but could stick like meconium if Republican […]
Chicken Fried News
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Chicken-Fried News: Ables’ commission
If any Chicken-Fried News team members imbibe on a few hard drinks of brown liquor and we’re not at our respective manors or in the bunkroom at CFN World Headquarters, then we call a cab or a rideshare or get one of the sobriety enthusiasts on our team to take us home. It’s not just […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Milking it
A company based out of Luther is selling raw milk and products made from donkeys after the company’s owners said that it helped treat their daughter’s rare autoimmune disease. A feature promoting Dulce de Donke arrived in email in-boxes from the taxpayer-supported Made in Oklahoma program in early August, according to The Oklahoman. The feature […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Lucky No. 7
Oklahoma City Council is rich in diversity and proudly mirrors the community it represents, more or less. James Greiner, representing Ward 1, is a conservative voice on the council whose appreciation for the arts is evident by his time spent as a graphic designer for Hobby Lobby. Arab-American doctor Ed Shadid represents Ward 2, while Larry […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Running (sic) four (sic) govornor (sic)
Let’s say you are a recent college graduate and your dream job is to be a copy editor at a major East Coast magazine or a slightly antagonistic group of anonymous satirical reporters working for an alterative weekly between Kansas and Texas. If that is indeed your dream, then the cover letter you submit to […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Ballpark petty
A “Bring your dog to the park” night is a common promotion for baseball teams during the dog days of the summer, but last week, the Tulsa Drillers used the opportunity to make the kind of petty event perfect for a viral tweet. The Drillers’ promotion night included a visit from a giant boa constrictor, […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Final showdown
Oklahoma City is in the midst of a renaissance. New schools, restaurants, retail and residential complexes are taking up space in the heart of Oklahoma. Old and new are colliding, and naturally, change is being met with resistance. One such protestor went so far as to riot throughout downtown streets Monday night naked, charging at […]
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Chicken-Fried News: High number
Lying happens all the time in 2018, often for political gain or just personal amusement, but ask any lawyer or good con artist and they’ll tell you that the last kind of lie you want to tell is one where the revelation of said lie is inevitable. Stitch it on a pillow, Grandma — it’s […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Party that cried ‘George’
The connection between a GOP fundraiser and the biggest fish in the Oklahoma City Thunder’s offseason was too much to ignore, but the party might’ve overexaggerated Paul George’s involvement. The state Republican Party sent out an invitation for its One Enchanted Evening August fundraiser saying that it would be held “in the beautiful showhome of […]
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Chicken-Fried News: Bad company
You know what they say about congressmen: It’s all drugs, sex and rock and roll. Wait. Maybe that’s a step too far. For congressmen, we suppose, it’s more like pharmaceutical drugs and insider trading, sexual harassment and fancy-schmancy parties on the lawn of the White House where it all goes down. This week’s political scandal […]